When my friend suggested I spend some time focusing on myself, I’m pretty sure this wasn’t what she meant. I know who I am. I know what I want. I have a fairly solid identity, but I’m not very good at focusing on myself. I have caused myself a lot of pain in the past trying to spare another person’s emotions. Trying to do the best thing.
In fact, I did something of the sort very recently. I have been ignoring the pain of it for months but it is becoming overwhelming. Saying I’m emotional right now might be an understatement.
The least logical course of action in an emotional time of life is to get a blog. Blogs can so easily be outlets for angst and drama. This isn’t a place for me to rant and I don’t really want to vent. I may post some thoughts, but I’ll do my best to avoid complaints. The fact is, I don’t have many problems. I have steady friends, a family that loves me, and I’m getting an education I want. Not to mention, a journal is much better than the Internet for whining about personal life. But what better way to focus on myself?
My resolution is to post something at least every Friday. Yes, I am aware this is Saturday, but I created the blog yesterday and that took a while. I will also be writing 750 words of creative writing a day and that may sneak on here on occasion. I am a writer. I want to write worlds and words and wonders. I can’t imagine that anyone else will read this, but that isn’t the point. I will write thoughts, experiences, inspirations, imaginings, and maybe revelations. A blog will be good for me.
I am happy, but perhaps a little perplexed. I’m at a time in my life where I am making a lot of decisions and making a lot of changes. So I’m getting into blogging. That’ll help me figure it all out, right?